15 things which make me happy #MondayMusings

2 weeks of January 2017 have already passed. How fast does time fly, isn’t it? Time simply keeps ticking away and if we do not take the initiative ourselves to pause and reflect, we are sure to get sucked in the tide.

It is January and the whole of North India is shivering under the spell of freezing temperatures. This period means that my parents fly down south to Bangalore to  spend time with us. This year, we have a full on re-union with my brother and sister-in-law also joining us in the city. It has been happier times for me and Dhruv waiting for them to arrive and finally, that they have arrived, we are experiencing some difficulty in containing our ever-spilling euphoria. Continue reading

Questions raising me!

This space, when it started, was about me and my struggles in raising the toddler Dhruv, primarily single handedly. Life, relations, connections, all had taken a toll on my spirit, breaking me. I was in complete shambles and that reflected in Dhruv too. As I moved along the way, I worked on fixing myself and, consequently, him. Books and reading helped tremendously and we, Dhruv and I, became avid readers. This resulted in this blog talking about his books that we read and our interactions that followed.

Over the last year, this space has seen another make-over with it becoming more about Dhruv’s questions. Questions which come from the stories we read, the places we visit, the programmes and movies Continue reading

Patanjali Pizza? Anyone?

We are a healthy eating family and by family, I mean us – the mother-son duo, keeping the third member out of this context. Dhruv is a picky eater, does not eat everything but is conscious of the classification between junk and healthy foods. He eats green vegetable such as methi (fenugreek) and drumstick leaves with equal ease with which he devours bhindi (okra)Beet root and spinach go into his chapatis with him being aware of it since he cannot eat them in any other form. Continue reading

The Good vs Bad question

For sometime I have been fielding questions about what is good or bad and who is good or bad. The other day Dhruv came up and asked me, “Is shut-up a bad word?” to which I replied that it is rude for a person to tell somebody to shut up. Since one answer is never enough to clear the air of confusion in his head, another question popped up, “Is it only rude for older people to say shut up or is it the same for children too?” I answered, “It is rude for both children and adults.” His next, “But, is it bad?” “Yes, being rude is bad“, I said. “No No. You did not answer. Is shut-up a bad word?” he pestered. Realizing the loop I created I told, “Yes, it is.” Finally satisfied, his next tale began about him breaking friendship with a certain boy from the school bus because that friend spoke bad words to him and the bad word was shut up.

Another round of Good vs Bad discussion took place upon watching the movie Angry Birds.

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Is Red good or bad? Is he bad because he likes nobody and nobody likes him? Are the pigs good or bad? Is the King Pig bad because he stole the birds’ eggs? Stealing is bad so he must be bad?

There were pauses between his questions which I could not fill with my answers the first time he posed them to me. But, the good thing about him is he never forgets his unanswered questions or those for which he does not get satisfactory answers and thus he keeps coming back. The problem, however, is I have subjective answers and Dhruv desires objectivity.

Going ahead with my undesired subjectivity, I explained, “None of them – Red, the pigs or the King Pig were absolutely good or bad. Red was bad for his anger issues and his problems with everyone on the birds island but he saved all the eggs  in the end so he was good. The pigs were good because they followed their King’s orders sincerely but since they were part of the stealing the eggs act hence they were bad. The King Pig was bad for destroying the birds island and running off with the eggs, still he was good for the pigs of his kingdom as he got eggs for them to eat.

Continuing my discourse, “Therefore, you see, nobody is a complete good or bad. Even you and I are both good and bad.” To this he started crying repeating “We are good people, we are not bad.

On such days I feel how difficult can it be to get things right.

How would you deal with such questions?

Linking this post with Microblog Mondays and Monday Musings

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Blasphemy!

Since time immemorial, in the patriarchal Indian culture, daughter-in-laws have been entrusted with the job of carrying the baton of their acquired (by the virtue of marriage) families’ traditions and customs. There is no other way around it. The ‘moving on’ from their parents’ customs to their in-laws’ customs is certain, whether it is immediate or a kind of an induction process in supposedly liberal families. Nobody asks them if the change is making any sense to them or if they are understanding what they are meant to do. The whole point is to do. What if they question? What if they seek rationale? Now, a culture which does not encourage the daughters to question, how can it allow the daughter-in-laws to do the same? It is blasphemy.

Somewhere, a daughter-in-law evolves over the years. She finds her calling. She finds a faith which is open to giving answers irrespective of her bodily being, a faith which places her out of congruence with those indisputable customs and rituals. She has once been chastised and today, her unshakable faith in herself emboldens her to test the familiar waters once again. This time she is not going to sink.

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Linking this post with Microblog Mondays and Monday Musings

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The day I turned Anne…

Over the last weekend, I read Anne of Green Gables and the least I can say is I turned Anne myself, minus the talkative part.

Anne is a dreamy and a highly imaginative girl who sees beauty all around in her surroundings. Reading it led me to recall how was I when I had been 11 years old. But, I could remember nothing.

Here is an excerpt from the book – Continue reading