January was an extremely good month after a long time. It made look 2019 a promising year for me. I had not a day of anxiety and even when it did try to grow upon me, I was much calmer and aware to nip in the bud. It was also a month when I blogged 3 – 4 times a week, a record for me. I did all the housework diligently and volunteered in Dhruv’s school twice a week. All in all, it was a productive and peaceful month.
Then came February.
February had a huge challenge to fill in January’s shoes and walk an extra mile however it fell flat. After a good first week, the negativity and hopelessness seeped in the second week and thrived until the end of the last week of the month. Anxieties, meltdowns and depressionary tendencies grounded me forcing me to take a break from active blogging and school.
Despite February being a troubled month, I kept trying to make it work. I am grateful today to retrospect all was not lost upon me.
(A) Whenever my mental health takes a dip, I take to colouring as a therapy. I managed to create hugely satisfying pieces of art.
Plus point – The pencil colours work every time in calming me.
(B) Dhruv had a half-term break in school in the 3 rd week. I couldn’t manage to do much with him. I let him play X-box every day for as long as he desired, a thing I would have never allowed if I was feeling alright.
Plus point – He felt he had the best holidays.
(C) During the half-term, one day, both of us went for a long walk to the riverside park at the other end of our small city. Both of us love this place where we get to walk up and down the hill and sit on the river bank.
Plus point – I clicked a lot of interesting pictures in the park. Dhruv, although, gets irritated with my photo clicking sojourns and terms it ‘faaltu ki photobaazi’.
(D) A break from active blogging found me working on my old posts, updating affiliate links, fixing broken images and adding featured images.
Plus point – This proved therapeutic as well.
(E) February was our first month of Netflix UK subscription. I watched the series Tidying up with Marie Kondo finally. More than the tidying up, what intrigued me were the people, their houses and their relationships. I also watched a few movies which, though were nice, left me teary. Not at all helpful with my situation.
The movies were – Wonder (watched it the second time), The Bookshop (a young widow’s struggle to open a bookshop and keep it running in the face of hardships), Eddie (an octogenarian’s resolve to give purpose to her wasted life by climbing the highest mountain in Scotland) and The Ottoman Lieutenant (this one has breathtaking cinematography but the story wasn’t much interesting).
Plus point – I was elated to discover the immensely good-looking male lead in The Ottoman Lieutenant is the same actor who played the character of Dawsey Adams in The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society, a book I loved and have read twice and the movie I may have watched several times in bits and pieces.
(F) Another Netflix programme – The Secret deserves a separate mention. I read this book a few years ago. Like last time with the book, this time the programme evoked the wonder of positive affirmation. I am exercising positive affirmation to deal with the thoughts of hopelessness. There is a common belief self-help books are of no help. It is true but only when we do not put the points mentioned in them into practice.
Plus point – The positive affirmation is working. So far so good. March has taken off well and I am grateful for it.
This was my February. How was yours? Do you have your gratitude list for February?