Your mama was once 4 years old too…

Dhruv turned 4 recently. This was the first time he was excited most about the concept of his own birthday since until now he had only been attending others’ birthday parties. Adding to his excitement I searched for my old photographs in my computer to show him my childhood photos.

This is my letter to Dhruv introducing him to my 4 year old self.

Dear Dhruv

Yesterday it was your 4th birthday and I was excitedly showing you photographs from my childhood. You asked me who is this child pointing your finger to me in the photo. I told you this is your mama, this is me. I could see that you were not convinced. I understood how could you be? How could you imagine your mummy to be as small as the child in that photo?


But to tell you the truth even your mama was 4 year old at one time.

She hated drinking milk in the same way as you do and just like you the only vegetable she ate at that time was bhindi (okra). She did not cry on her first day at the big school.

She used to ask her parents, who are your Naanu and Nani, to plan picnic at the zoo every Sunday. Now I do not remember whether it was the picnic or the sight of animals which she enjoyed most. May be it were the animals since she once cried a lot because her parents could not carry the lion’s cub home.

Even she loved eating chocolates the way you do. Her mother had another small baby to take care of in addition to your mama and had limited energies, hence was not able to brush her teeth at night. So this little girl in the photo had to pay the price in the form of decayed teeth which had to be extracted sitting in the chair at the dentist’s clinic. Now you know why I run after your life with the toothbrush in my hand every night and morning.

She was also as inquisitive, as you, hurling out her never ending questions to her mother. Once her mother got very exhausted tendering to her tsunami of questions and when she could no longer provide satisfactory answers, this innocent little girl slapped hard on her mother’s cheek shocking her. I am so glad Dhruv for you understand and hold onto your questions for another time when I tell you that I am tired.

This girl whom you were pointing to in the photo and who I claim to be me was a quiet and a sober child. I know this is the point you would find the toughest to imagine because the whole day you hear me voicing out various directions and instructions in conjunction with your name at various pitches and decibels. The only time you find me quiet is when I get drained and take my time out. Sobriety… would ask what it is? You might feel the need to google it too (wishful thinking on your part for I have still not taught you to read it all) since you can see no traces of it on my face now. I cringe my nose, create creases on my forehead, jump around the house inspite of my heavy weight causing shudders to the family living on the floor below and dramatize a lot while reading and telling you stories.

Continuing further, this girl in the photo was docile and showed obedience without asking any questions. I hope you are not thinking about why the characteristics and traits change in people as they grow up because in the absence of this change thing, your life in your eyes would have been so much more better. You would have been never denied of the large quantities of chocolates, cookies, juices etc which you keep pestering for having a docile me. But, my child its fortunate and unfortunate at the same time that people including your mama change with time for good.


Like you and unlike you, I was once a little child of 4 years too.


Your mama

Originally posted on World of Moms


  1. I had smiles and tears welling up while reading this post, Anamika. Such a precious, darling post aptly outlining the child you were and juxtaposing it with Dhruv’s childhood was so lovely!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. What a lovely concept! All children depend on their parents as kids, stand in judgement of them as teenagers and young adults, understand them in their 40s, and miss them sorely once they are gone:) I am sure your son will treasure such letters to him when he is all grown up:)

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I was so moved reading your post, Anamika. Could almost imagine you explainign things to him in a nice, friendly way how different and similar you both are/can be. The beauty of our childhood is sometimes lived through our children’s experiences and revisiting events that happened in our lives and this is such a wonderful tale of two childhoods each unique in their own ways. Such a beautiful reading, this one 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. This was an easy way of explaining things to him without the urge of tearing my hair apart in the absence of his ‘whys, kyuns and kyun nahins’. Yet, with him it feels like I am reliving my childhood again albeit one difference – I too have the twinkling in my eye now just like him (pointing to the 2kids in the photo where the one who has twinkling eyes is my brother) 😀

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Its called the Mother’s way of connecting with the kids and you rightly said that it was easy for you to do so. Dhruv is a very bright kid and very sensitive too and it was such a pleasure to chat with him and answer his long list of questions. I wish he continues to ‘bother’ you with more questions and you both share wonderful moments because once they grow up this magical bond they have in childhood gets replaced by friends. We must meet again along with Dhruv and Arjyo 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  4. This was so adorable Anamika. I could virtually imagine your childhood years of tantrums and inquisitiveness! I am sure you are gifting Dhruv a beautiful collection of your lovely memoirs.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The first time I read your comment and saw the word ‘tantrums’ being referred to me, I scratched my head because until now this is the word I have only associated this word with Dhruv, par Kala tumne meri aankhen khol di 😀 Thus, I realise even I threw tantrums.
      Thank you for your wonderful comment. It made my day 🙂


  5. Such a sweet post, Anamika. I’m imagining Dhruv reading all these a few years from now. As Kala said you’re creating something wonderful for him. Tell him I said that that 4-year old girl has grown into a beautiful woman with a loving heart!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Anamika – beautiful letter and left a smile on my face. This is a heart felt letter and I am sure Dhruv would be happy to read these posts when he grows up. You are a loving mother. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. That was a cute letter to Dhruv. We have all changed so much that it is absolutely necessary to take out time to go back to old memories and photographs and compare ourselves, then and now It helps to understand the areas we need to work on improvement. I still can’t believe that Dhruv leaves you alone when you say you’re tired. I get bounced on if I mention the word tired. I am no longer supposed to feel tired since I am not going to work outside of the house. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.