Kids are hard. Marriage after kids is harder.

I have been through this period not without the difficult part. Being written off as overtly possesive about my baby, I doubted everybody in the house whether it was my husband or his parents in the task of caring for the baby. I did not trust anybody and on top of it Ihad to leave the baby with the same set of people everyday for going to work. While at the workplace, I would constantly worry about my child and my ratings suffered. And did I contemplate breaking of my marriage……shhh….hush….that is a forbidden thought in my culture.

I dedicate this blog post to my husband hoping this can help him in understanding my circumstances during those times.

I dedicate this blog post to my in-laws and his parents that I was as much a human rather than an insane daughter-in-law.

My husband and I were brilliant communicators before we had children. I don’t just mean talking about mindless drivel over a pint or five. I mean discussing as in depth as was humanly possible about what our lives together would look like through every eventuality.

We discussed everything about making living together work, making the finances work, splitting up chores, making a marriage work, making everything fair. We even discussed what our divorce might look like. Just in case.

As if we were following some cliché storyline, we fell pregnant; then came the biggest discussions of all. We covered everything we could possibly think of on how we would make it work; what our expectations were of each other as parents, what our expectations of ourselves would be as parents. We meticulously picked apart our childhoods to take the good and dump the bad. We were ready. We were mildly smug about our readiness…

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  1. And i was thinking i am the one failing each day. If someone miles away feels identical, i am sure there are many in close quarter but keeping sshhhh word between the lips, tight lips.


    1. What will the world think of me? Log kya kahenge? Thats the reason behind keeping the sshhh. Accepting our inner challenges, our inner demons is not easy. We move around, meet people putting up a mask of a perfect mother and a woman while everything inside may be falling apart.


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